Solitude

She’s hoping to get over her failed relationship. She’s done talking to the Oklahoma City attorney she hired for the case. She’s ready to move on with her life after experiencing the nightmare she went through.

A valuable lesson learned: when a man strikes you once, he will strike you again. That’s what Oprah said and it turned out to be true for her. And she regretted not listening to well-meaning family and friends. She should have seen it coming but she was totally blind to his faults. She is paying a high price because of it but is still thankful for the glimmer of hope she sees in the horizon.

Something to set the mood for love this Monday morning… Just As Long As We Have Love by the Spinners.

Happy Monday!

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Yes, I am afraid to let go. Don’t ask me why. I have been in love a couple of times in the past. I’ve seen my share of successful marriages. But still, it’s hard for me to let myself go.

I know they say that it is better to have loved than not to have loved at all. I fell in love and every time it was a failure. Tell me, do I fall in love again just to prove how good it is to love and be loved? Do I let go and let my heart be free?

The truth of the matter is, I am afraid to fall in love. I go crazy over a man when I am in love. I tend to give too much and I feel like I throw away whatever self-respect I have when I am totally crazily enamored over a man. Trust me, I’ve been there! I have seen myself go gaga over someone who’s not even worthy of a quarter of my love.

Imagine how I busted my savings over the best weight loss supplement I could find. Sure, I benefited from it. But I wouldn’t have done something so rash if I wasn’t in love. I also busted my savings on call cards just to monitor where he is at any given time. I put my job in peril over a long distance call I made when he was assigned elsewhere. I was that gaga!

So tell me, how safe it is for me to fall in love again?

Dancing is one way to burn those holiday excess pounds you gained. I love dancing! I don’t care if I have two left feet. I don’t care if I look funny when I am dancing. I just know I love it and it’s the best option I have to losing weight, next to popping in some fat burners from the market.

I have no grand plans of being uber sexy. I just want to be able to walk a block or two without feeling like I’m going to keel over and die any moment. I also would like to have more options when it comes to the clothes I wear. Not like right now where I only have a few choice clothes I can wear because of my size.

So I am going to dance my pounds away hoping it will all go down the drain after I sweat it out and take a shower!

I wish I can tell my friend what the photo above says… just because your lips touched doesn’t mean your hearts joined. I’m afraid she’s living in a make-believe world where the guy is extremely in love with her. They’ve been together for just a few months and yet she’s already planning on marrying him. She’s even planning a life in his hometown already and what she’ll say to win the hearts of his bosom buddies. It’s totally pathetic to see and hear but I can’t just burst her bubble. She’s too damn happy about it!

I know one of these days the guy himself will be the one to burst her bubble of happiness. I wish it won’t happen. I wish I’m wrong. She deserves to be happy after all the heartaches she’s been through.

Drew told Ann that she’s beautiful no matter what size she is. Ann was really happy when she heard it. She knew that Drew was sincere when he said that. They’ve been together for five years and he’s never changed since the moment he asked her out for the first time.

But that declaration also signaled the start of Ann’s quest to lose weight. She enrolled at a local gym. She shopped for weight loss supplements recommended to her by friends. She really got herself to the path to a healthier her.

Guess what? Ann has never looked as sexy as she is now to Drew. She’s lost 30 pounds and she’s healthy and sexy!

I am so envious!

Intimacy is just at the beginning of your relationship. In the middle, you have to have a mutual respect to be able to get through the many trials that will come your way. Sooner or later, when the intimacy is gone and you two are left alone in the twilight of your life, all you have left are the conversations that will keep you going.

Photo credit: http://icanread.tumblr.com/post/329434381/by-jg-kyne

She is taking every step she can take to a better her. I know that’s her goal for this year. And it became a goal because of her boyfriend. She’s always been motivated by the current man in her life. I remember she got bottles of lotion for acne when she was going steady with a medicine student. It’s to eliminate a few on her right cheek that’s starting to spread. But if she’s not with the man, the acne would have spread to her left cheek for sure. Another time, her hair was really limp because she’s not taking good care of it. Friends were surprised to see her with a new haircut and a bouncy hair. You got it right! She started dating a guy she met online.

She’s always been like that. Motivation comes in the form of love. Nothing wrong with it. But what if she ends up single for life?

I feel bloated most of the time. That’s why my sister and I will soon be joining a gym once again. We did it a couple of years ago and really lost weight. Unfortunately, genes and lack of discipline kicked in and we gained back every pound we lost. Bad, I know. But when you come from a large family like ours, who loves to eat like there’s always a feast, you will also lose any amount of discipline you have. That’s for sure! Your fat burner pills will work but then you’d binge again and it will all go up in smoke!

I know, I know. It’s all a battle of wills. And this year, it will be. This year won’t pass without me getting near that goal weight of mine!

I know that with the way my work schedule is, sooner or later I would be in need of the top eye creams I can get in the market. I work late at night and stay up until early in the morning. And then I get a few hours of sleep and it’s off to work once again. Every day I do this. Every single day I get little sleep. I am not complaining since I am earning good money out of this. But then there are days when I just want to rest and sleep as much as I can. I do this on weekends.

Sometimes, though, I have to work even on weekends.

When it comes to love, I am not an expert. But I try to compensate for it by being a good listener.

My friends would always come to me when they have love problems. Not for an advice per se. I do believe that they need someone who would listen to them rant more than anything else. And I can be a good listener if I put my mind to it. Short attention span aside, I know I can stay still and listen to a friend pour her heart out.

That’s been my role for years. A listener. A reluctant advisor to the love sick friends of mine. No complaints here. As long as they don’t abuse my listening powers, everything’s cool and they can rant and rant all they want!

He is coming over by the end of the month to visit her. It’s the third visit since they became a couple. Maintaining a long distance relationship is hard but they managed, and still do, to make their work. Sure, it might stop working later. But before that happens, they will surely find a way to fix it. I know they are going to myrtle beach for some romantic getaway. She’s already having her hair done, foot spas every week, body scrubs, facials, and so on. She’s practically jumping up and down whenever his arrival is mentioned.

I do pray that things will work out for them. She’s already invested so much in the relationship. Physically, emotionally, financially. She’s even putting things on hold for him. I know it’s not right to put one’s happiness dependent on another person. But in her case, it’s really like that in every relationship she gets into.

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